Back to main websiteBarriers and Challenges
Men play a significant role in children’s lives, whether they are fathers, partners, or other important figures. However, learning from research and practice shows that they are often less visible in safeguarding work.
Barriers to engagement are not always about willingness. They are often shaped by experience, expectation, and how services are designed. Recognising these barriers helps practitioners build a clearer understanding of family dynamics and avoid missing both risk and protective factors.
Barriers Men Face
Men’s engagement with services is rarely straightforward.
For some, it is influenced by past experiences, particularly where contact with professionals has felt judgemental or negative. Others may feel unsure about their role, or uncertain about what is expected of them.
Practical factors also play a part. Work patterns, lack of flexibility, and services that don’t actively include men can all affect whether they are able to engage.
Men often describe:
- Feeling judged, blamed, excluded or labelled when they come into contact with services
- Previous negative experiences with services
- Being unsure what their role is in plans for their child
- Worrying about the consequences of being open (e.g. losing contact). Fear of legal consequences or child removal
- Finding it difficult to talk about emotions or ask for help
- Believing services are not designed with them in mind and being too “mother-focused”
- Literacy, language, or digital access barriers
- Work patterns (shift work, long hours) limiting availability
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Barriers are often layered rather than separate: Emotional: shame, fear, lack of confidence
Practical: time, access, competing demands
Social: expectations about masculinity and help-seekingThese factors combine to shape how men engage, or don’t engage, with services.
Listening to Men
and their experiences
Across research and practice, men often say they want to be involved but do not always feel included. In many cases, contact is indirect or happens later, once concerns have escalated.
This can reinforce a sense of being on the edge of the process rather than part of it.
Common themes from men include:
- Communication is mainly directed to mothers
- They feel like an “afterthought” in planning
- They are not always asked for their views
- They want clearer, more direct conversations
- They value being treated as important in their child’s life
Barriers Practitioners Experience
when engaging men
Practitioners also face challenges when engaging men, particularly where there is complexity, conflict, or risk present.
Confidence is often a key factor. Engaging men can involve difficult conversations, and without the right support, this can lead to hesitation or avoidance.
Alongside this, systems and processes do not always make engagement easy. Historically, services have focused more on mothers, which can influence how professionals approach their work.
This can result in:
- Contact being made primarily through mothers
- Men not being routinely included in assessments
- Uncertainty about how to challenge safely through fear of conflict or aggression
- Limited use of tools to support engagement
- Competing priorities reducing time to build relationships
- Organisational processes not requiring father engagement
- Limited information or systems capturing father details
- Managing disguised compliance or avoidance
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Learning for Practice A consistent message from reviews and research is that men are not “hard to reach,” they are often not actively reached.
Effective engagement starts with:
Making early, direct contact
Being clear about expectations
Maintaining professional curiosity
Seeing men as part of the safeguarding picture from the outset
Men Who May Pose Higher Risk
Some men may present a higher level of risk to children.
This includes those with a history of harmful behaviour, patterns of avoidance, or where there are concerns about control, aggression, or instability. It may look like:
- History of domestic abuse or coercive control
- Substance misuse impacting parenting
- Criminal behaviour or exploitation
- Emotional unavailability or harmful attitudes
- Patterns of avoidance, hostility, or manipulation
- Use of intimidation or control within professional interactions
Learning from safeguarding reviews shows that when men are not fully considered, risks can be missed or misunderstood.
Working with Risk
Engagement with higher-risk men requires clarity and consistency.
It is not about avoiding contact, but about working in a way that keeps children safe while maintaining professional authority.
In practice this means:
- Being clear and direct about concerns
- Setting consistent boundaries
- Avoiding reliance on second-hand information
- Working as part of a multi-agency approach
- Recognising signs of disguised compliance
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Guidance Keep the child’s lived experience central
Ensure all significant men are identified and considered
Balance engagement with challenge
Use structured assessment and risk tools
Share information appropriately -
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Building Confidence in Practice Confidence develops over time. It is supported by training, reflection, and shared learning rather than relying on individual experience alone.
Practitioners are more likely to engage effectively when they feel supported to have honest, direct conversations and to reflect on their own approach.Confidence is strengthened through:
Reflective supervision
Opportunities to practise difficult conversations
Access to tools and frameworks
Learning from case reviews and shared practice -
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Practitioner tips! What HelpsBe clear, calm and respectful
Use curiosity before challenge
Don’t avoid difficult conversations
Recognise and reinforce positive change
Stay focused on outcomes for the child
